MAKING LOVE TO ANOTHER MAN'S WIFE

In the 70's, a singer known as Clarence Carter recorded a hit song 'Making love to another man's wife' which was quite huge back in the days. In it, he narrates in first person, how he was seduced by his friend's wife and fell for her wiles and eventually was caught pants down, making love to her! That song was as controversial then as the topic is probably tepid in today's times. That may be so because what we held as taboo just a few years ago, is more of the norm right now. In Nigeria, adulterous affairs are probably a dime a dozen, with such being done without any care in the world! Stories abound about salacious affairs in the posh neighborhoods of Lekki and Victoria Garden City. It seems the new mantra now among most ladies is 'what my hubby does, I can do better'. And such ladies flaunt their cougar mates in public too! I'm going to be doing more write-ups on my findings on this blog in the next few days which will be shocking to lots of people too! So keep on following me here for the true tales of a lifetime.

THE SEXDUCATION OF BRIDGET

At a seminar on Domestic Violence yesterday, I was one of the speakers and during the question and answer session, a young nineteen year old girl opened up and told her story. She was raped at the age of 16 by four lads who lured her via Facebook to their lair and had their way with her. 'They used condoms' , she said. She said she was numb for a few days after and could not tell her parents because she was scared what would happen to her. A few months later, she was again gang-raped by two different lads, living in the next street to hers. The same way the first gang contacted her; Facebook. With a growing hatred for men, she said she found herself on a sex mission as if on automated program me. On her last count, she has slept with over 40 guys! She has become an emotionless creature with a growing distaste for men. To her, men are only good to be used and she thinks sleeping with men and getting small amounts of money from them for services rendered is just payback enough. Of course lots of people at the seminar rushed to her aid and offered counseling. But I just could not help wondering since yesterday. A deep anger burns in me over her plight and I am so pissed at the society as well. A failed system which has eroded all moral values. The Facebook predators is a story for another day. What a cruel world!

SUNDAY SERMON: JESUS CHRIST: The First Superstar!

Being in the film and entertainment business, I clearly understand how it works. As a celebrity, you become a staple diet in the gossip and talk consumption of people all over your space. Your life comes under scrutiny and everywhere you go, you are watched, hailed or crowded by fans who wish to have a feel of you or just to snap pictures as a form of identification with you. The celebrity loses all his or her privacy, moreso when the press and gossip magazines are on his case daily with stories which might be fabricated or embellished just to sell more! Musing over this, my mind went to Jesus this morning and the popular question,' What would Jesus do?' came to my mind. And then it hit me! Jesus was actually the world's first superstar! Given the mind-blowing miracles he performed, the raising of the dead, the healing of the sick, the open forgiveness of sins and more, it was no wonder he had never-before-seen crowds of people after him whenever he went. Everyone wanted a piece of him, only this time, for spiritual succor. But he had his share of his loss of privacy too. That's why the Bible says that most times, he had to move away from the crowd to rest when he felt tired. But even at that, he had a listening ear for everyone and treated every problem attentively. In my analogy, I can liken the huge crowds always following Jesus as the fans, the Pharisees and Sadducees who sneered at him and told exaggerated tales about him as the gossip mags, the preachings he gave at every town and village as His music concerts, the disciples he had with him as his management team, the questions he was asked as his interviews and many more. Indeed, Jesus is the world's first superstar, while on earth and even after his resurrection. And in accepting him and believing in him, we all have a piece of that superstardom. We all are celebrities in our own way, in Christ. Shalom.

MY VERY FIRST 'BJ'

It was the fad in Benin City way back in my secondary school days. I attended the Immaculate Conception College and in my Year Three, I seemed to be the only boy in the testosterone-charged citadel who had not gotten a 'BJ'. All the boys would discuss how they got theirs with gleeful descriptions and saucy jigs mostly ending their recant. I also noticed that such boys thereafter seemed to walk with a swagger or a new jaunt to their steps. Now, there was I , a very conservative kid, at the cusp of puberty, still in the 'dark ages'. An innate shyness then towards girls was my secret battle. It wasn't as if I was not 'fine' enough. On the contrary, I had been complimented with being a lad with teenage good looks by boys in school and sometimes their female friends from the nearby girl school but for me that was where it ended. And so, when most of my friends in secondary school were either discovering the pleasures of one emotional adventure after another, with some even going further to exploit the daring sexual adventurism of their nubile curiosity, there I was; still a prude but a pride to my folks. That was all that mattered to me then and it would all have gone on well for me, if not for the 'BJ' fad that crept into the scene! And I seemed to be the only one who had not yet had one! Somehow, I became the butt of jokes and I would hear a few sniggers from the boys who could clearly see that I hadn't yet had a 'BJ'. Soon, I couldn't take it no more. I just had to have one. And then she came along and that changed everything. Kay was her name. 14 years of age like me with 'forget-me-not' eyes and a pouting beauty, barely restrained by her hidden sexuality. I can't ever remember how I got round to talking to her but we seemed to hit it off almost immediately that day at her school's Interhouse Sports Competition. A couple of after-school 'walk-dates' later, she noticed I would always sigh involuntarily when I was with her and she asked me what was wrong. I had to stutter the truth to her. ' I have been trying to get a 'BJ' for a while because the boys in school have made me the laughing stock'. I told her. 'Why haven't you had one?' she asked. How could one answer that question, what with my ultra-conservatism shaped by a combination of Biblical morality and self-imposed discipline of not just doing things because they were the vogue. 'Do you want to get one?' she asked me in a very innocent voice. I could only croak an affirmative. Kay took my hand and led me through a dark alley in her street. I followed meekly. My heart was beating fast and alien sensations were dancing in my body at the feel of her touch. We came to the end of the dark alley. She turned to me and asked again. 'You are really sure you want a 'BJ'? Won't your mum be angry with you?' She had a teasing smile as she said that. 'My mum won't mind, I'm sure' I replied. Kay nodded and guided me out of the alley into a building which had a Barber shop, owned by her brother. Thirty minutes later, I came out all smiles with the then reigning 'Brothers Johnson' hairstyle on my head. All thanks to Kay! If you are reading this and you thought I was going to talk about some other meaning of BJ, then you certainly need deliverance. Repent!

TIMAYA AND THE ROAD LESS TRAVELLED.

TIMAYA has a new album out. It's titled 'UPGRADE'.Before the full album came out a couple of weeks back, I had been familiar with one song which seemed to be a hit on the party circuits and bus-park blaring cd vendors. Each time, I heard that song, I would silently ask myself, 'who is this Jamaican artist singing audaciously about bum-bums?'. The song 'Bum-Bum' is a new experiment of techno-raga-dancehall and it's quite a departure from the usual style of Timaya. I was shocked when I learnt that Timaya did that song. For once, a little bit of grudging respect for his musical prowess began to grow in me. Before now, Timaya was to me, lyrically deficient. He had found a winning formula with his self-praise style of singing, always finding fault with one 'bad belle' person or singing about his worn-weary exploits and nouveau wealth. His first three albums had over 70% of such lyrical drivel ( my opinion) but they seemed to have found a ready fan base as the sales of each encouraged him to continue with 'his winning formula'. After all, you don't change a winning team mid-way into the season. But I believe his last album before this one, 'PLANTAIN BOY', must have opened his eyes that the audience had just about had enough of the annoying braggadocio in his songs. Sales of the album, though good, were not enough to retain him in the commercial pecking order of the music sector. As the popular saying goes, 'you are as good as your last work' when you are a creative person. Thus, instead of the music doing the work of ingraining Timaya into our conciousness, his personal fights and foibles did more of the work. I believe that became the turning point in his career. I think somehow, the fellow went into his inner recesses and came out with this near-superb new album. I call it near-superb because from the little I have heard and after sampling opinions from music experts and producers, we all seem to be in agreement that the new work is TIGHT. It is a pure dancehall pleasure. A radical departure from his past works. It's also instructive to note that Timaya changed producers in this album. This time, he used a new guy called YOUNG D. Someone correct me if I am wrong there. Using a one-Producer format worked this time for Timaya. The beats are very hot and Timaya wisely and largely stayed off his Self-praise lyricism. Though a professional mind can easily deduce that most of the songs had lyrics which were largely composed on the spur of the moment in the studio, that does not in any way hinder the surges of pleasure the listener gets from the album. Timaya's experiment has turned out to be a focal point in defining club music in the techno-pop era we all find ourselves in. The massive sales of the album off the shelves these past couple of weeks ( according to market reports) prove that his new road trip might be less bumpy than his past highways.

STEPHANIE'S OKOTIE'S ANGST.

'STEPHANIE OKOTIE'S ANGST:' Yesterday, I read online references of the now estranged wife of Reverend Kris OKOTIE'S public comments on Facebook. It sure made the buzz online and when I read it at first, I could not make anything of it but just a controlled wail of a women in emotional pains. A second reading of her posts this morning made me see things from a different perspective. The woman is hurting! I'm trying to psycho-analyze her present predicament and one could say that she could be facing storms of bewilderment and shock at the turn of events. She did mention something akin to ' being called all sorts of names...mermaid, witch...' and I wonder who's calling her that? Is it the loyal church members of her husband's church or is it someone close to her whom she feels betrayed by? Some people might ask sarcastically why is this news? 'And wetin concern you for this matter?' Here's my answer. Reverend Kris Okotie is not just a well-known celebrity, he was a three-time Presidential aspirant in the past three electoral processes in Nigeria. His life is any more no private than a prime-time television show. Aspiring for the highest office in Nigeria makes him come under public scrutiny more than ever. Even if he didn't win, his actions and lifestyle would always be judged by the public as ' the man who would have been our President'. So, asking for indiscretion in public commentaries over his recent divorce would be a bit amorphous. For most people, it's hard to imagine how a very beautiful woman such as Stephanie could ever be twice divorced! But then, beauty is not a judge of character, for all it is worth. However, a lot of questions have been asked about the Marital capabilities of Reverend Kris. I think such questions are in the realm of conjecture. The most important lesson (if any at all) is that WE ALL ARE HUMAN!